Wednesday, January 07, 2009

The Daily Nightmare

I started the daily sweater on my flight over here and have been knitting dutifully on it for weeks now - including hours and hours of clickety-click boring stockinette stitch. I threw it in a Cool as a Moose bag and took it with me everywhere and knit, knit, knit. I read the forum entries in Ravelry to be sure and try it on as you go, isn't that the whole big benefit of knitting from the top-down? Trying it on as you go?

Even the cat helped out:
You know where this is going, don't you? I knit for hours, days, weeks and couldn't be bothered to take 3 whole minutes to transfer half of the sweater to longer circulars so that I could try it on. I mean, if anything, it'll probably be too small, right? And, if it's too big, then it's supposed to be a substitute for the roomie sweatshirt, so at least it'll still look better than its predecessor. Right? RIGHT?
After finishing the back ribbing, I had the sweater off of the too-small circular for the first time and tried it on last night to discover it is, in fact, a huge blue blob of knit stitches and pretty cables.
Not only is it too big around the middle, but nearly flowing across my back.
Being that this yarn is named Columbine Blossom, I could accept that some flowing is desirable, if nothing, to recreate images of columbine blossoms across summer fields. But I don't like the idea of wearing yards of flowy cotton when I could have a cute, shapely sweater that actually flatters me.
I mean, I could buy a shapeless, pretty-colored sweater any day of the week. But a flattering blue pullover with decorative cables should make all those around me envious of my fabulous color and fabric choice and supreme knitting skills. That's why we all started knitting, right? It wasn't just for the chagrined Thank You's on Christmas when recipients find their yearly gift is handmade and full of expensive non-itchy wool (which they will pretend is itchy just to be difficult, the little buttheads! It's freaking angora for crying out loud!). But, we imagined sweaters that no one has seen in the local boutiques or Old Navys - a fit to make your younger relatives jealous and the ability to alter, fix and adjust anything to your preference and BENEFIT.

I'm sure I have learned a valuable lesson and will try to remind myself of that through the tears and upper-arm muscle ache as I rip out and re-wind approximately ten pounds of cotton today. I will write a little note to keep on my bathroom mirror and maybe even my rearview mirror in the car, maybe my wallet, too.......
You're never as fat as you think! (Even after Christmas!)

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